Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
