Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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