Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.

  (240): View more from Maryland

  What a good friend

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  (301): There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out. (240): What a good friend http://tfl.nu/qs4m
  Replies (6) Good night (1284) Bad night (407)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you

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  (208): And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you http://tfl.nu/dnhr
  Replies (15) Good night (3113) Bad night (777) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it

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  (619): The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it http://tfl.nu/ndqf
  Replies (66) Good night (790) Bad night (4105) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being

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  (440): You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being http://tfl.nu/lse1
  Replies (39) Good night (1618) Bad night (3849) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday

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  (810): I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday http://tfl.nu/aiy9
  Replies (34) Good night (509) Bad night (5937)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell

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  (506): Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell http://tfl.nu/5oyd
  Replies (19) Good night (3872) Bad night (1063) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.

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  (816): Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower. http://tfl.nu/cq6t
  Replies (41) Good night (1343) Bad night (13179) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"

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  (732): He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!" http://tfl.nu/74ai
  Replies (9) Good night (1395) Bad night (5601) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices

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  (207): Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices http://tfl.nu/clic
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work

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  (443): We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work http://tfl.nu/ryiy
  Replies (11) Good night (2038) Bad night (940) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you

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  (832): you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you http://tfl.nu/7l95
  Replies (9) Good night (718) Bad night (3151) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.

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  (530): for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs. http://tfl.nu/et1w
  Replies (16) Good night (3510) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?

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  (859): I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!? http://tfl.nu/cr9e
  Replies (5) Good night (494) Bad night (1273) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.

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  (253): The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case. http://tfl.nu/nkd8
  Replies (2) Good night (2009) Bad night (920)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?

  (214): View more from Texas

  Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.

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  (724): Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"? (214): Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments. http://tfl.nu/ino1
  Replies (1) Good night (1734) Bad night (367)

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