ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
