Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
