is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize