If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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