apparently the secret to your success is patron
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize