Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
