hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
