im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I just gargled with NyQuil
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
