Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
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I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
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Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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