My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
