I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
It's shark week go big or go home
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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