Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
