Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
