So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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