I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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