It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize