Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel

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  (704): I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel http://tfl.nu/5qbt
  Replies (9) Good night (3499) Bad night (835)
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  (607): View more from New York

  I've blown a few things in my day

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  (607): I've blown a few things in my day http://tfl.nu/5p5t
  Replies (9) Good night (2981) Bad night (662)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.

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  (269): Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving. http://tfl.nu/awvb
  Replies (8) Good night (3070) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed

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  (412): I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed http://tfl.nu/up7a
  Replies (12) Good night (3671) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow

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  (860): i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow http://tfl.nu/61vx
  Replies (66) Good night (769) Bad night (6206)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.

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  (207): I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something. http://tfl.nu/x6k7
  Replies (21) Good night (6925) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween

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  (317): having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween http://tfl.nu/sqve
  Replies (8) Good night (3140) Bad night (896)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.

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  (785): You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina. http://tfl.nu/6dr6
  Replies (8) Good night (3292) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people

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  (850): the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people http://tfl.nu/zcj8
  Replies (3) Good night (1691) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.

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  (732): He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper. http://tfl.nu/grbq
  Replies (8) Good night (4454) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"

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  (845): I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl" http://tfl.nu/lnr2
  Replies (5) Good night (1345) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.

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  (760): She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid. http://tfl.nu/c9kh
  Replies (3) Good night (642) Bad night (1461)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.

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  (315): That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes. http://tfl.nu/lakd
  Replies (5) Good night (925) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)

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  (254): We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :) http://tfl.nu/s9j9
  Replies (8) Good night (826) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.

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  (816): Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is. http://tfl.nu/6l7w
  Replies (1) Good night (557) Bad night (114)

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