I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes