if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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