Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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