Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
