adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
