why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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