I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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