All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
