I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
