saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
