your room smells of hookers.
And success
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize