Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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