can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
