hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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