margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
