I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
