In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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