the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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