maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
