As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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