I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
