I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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