You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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