I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
