Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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