come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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