Ambien. No doubt about it.
the condom got lost in my hair
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
