you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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