I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
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