youre lurking in front of me
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It's blow job season.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
