Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
