Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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